to name

I must return to  the way I think of working.

In fact,  is it imperative to change the name  of what it is that I do? Imperative because it is about change and changing the what and possibly the how ?  Do I work ? Is it a prayer?  What?  A practice ? But then, a practice for what ?

I have always worked like crazy. Long hours. Difficult strategies for production. And I like that scenario. But even as I write this I realize that , THAT  working process is akin to training-- but creativity is like training -- It is simultaneously exhausting and renewing.  I can return to the things that  function well for me . Materials , time , space in my head and heart to approach authentically  the matter at hand. See. My whole way of thinking about making is about problem solving and resolution  and back to problem solving. Is that bad if  the work is for God? If art making is about problem solving and organizing of material, idea and process  in a meaningful way than it is renewing. The work is work that is fulfilling as well as  emptying --- not vacant  emptying but  creating a place for God--- who is already seeking a place with in the work. 

That's the change. Empty and full. The process must lead to a renewing and releasing for it to  be work.